I have a regular class!

Alli and I on the Georgetown Waterfront. Photo by Andrea Lynn Taylor. 

Great news: I'm going to have a weekly yoga class in Arlington every Monday! I'll be teaching with my fantastic friend Alli, which means two times the assists when both of us are there. It's from 7-8 PM and in the party room of a Court House Place, an apartment building at 1320 N Veitch St, Arlington, VA 22201.

We currently have a cozy, small group but would love to see more. If you are interested in coming, you can sign up online here under "Avalon Bay- Courthouse Place". Let me know if you are planning on coming and I can make sure you don't have any issues getting into the building.

I hope to see you there!
XO,
KCZ

DIY Hippie Deodorant

My deodorant situation.

Homemade Deodorant: OK, so I know it sounds a little out there. But if you've already decided to go aluminum-free on your pits, you know that a vast majority of the hippie deodorants out there simply don't work. Tom's sometimes works, but only in the apricot scent. For awhile I was into the crystal but you could only apply it on clean, dry skin (my pits are usually neither). There's a whole slew of other brands that smell great in the tube, but once you put them on you just smell like... armpit.

So, I decided to go full-on DIY and make it myself. The internet is rife with recipes for homemade deodorant, almost all of them involving coconut oil and a combination of cornstarch or baking powder.

The one I chose has a cream & powder component to it, which means you slather on a bit of the cream, then dust some powder on top. After that: you're good to go. I haven't had a stinky-scented surprise when I lift my arms for Down Dog since I started using this magic concoction:

Part A: Cream:
Combine the following:

• 1/4 cup extra virgin coconut oil
• 1/2 tbsp vitamin E oil
• 10 drops tea tree oil
• 10 drops lavender essential oil (optional)

Part B: Powder
Combine the following:

• 1/2 cup baking powder
• 1/2 cup corn starch
• 5 drops tea tree oil
• 2 dried bay leaves (optional)

When you're ready to apply, rub a pea-sized bit of the cream in each armpit then dust some of the powder on with a makeup brush/washcloth/your hands. Bam! You're done. Look at you, hippie.

Note: according to the internet, some people are sensitive to baking powder. If your skin gets angry when you use this combo, try replacing the baking powder with arrowroot powder. 

I'm Team Player of the Month!

The powers that be at Tranquil Space decided to name me Team Player of the Month! Click the link and you'll find my answers to a few questions about yoga, my hobbies, etc.

I absolutely adore working at Tranquil Space Arlington. Oftentimes I'll come into work feeling kinda crappy and an hour into my shift I'll realize that I've completely perked up. Tranquil Space has an amazing community of yoga teachers and students that I'm so grateful to be a part of! The free yoga is a great bonus, too. 

Charity Class for Autism Speaks

Charlotte, Beth, Alli and me in Baddha Konasana (Bound Angle Pose).  Photo by Andrea Lynn Taylor. 

When my friend Charlotte cares about a cause, she is a fundraising fiend.  This Sunday (10/27), she's hosting two Yoga Classes at Tranquil Space Dupont (in 1632 17th St NW Washington, DC) to benefit Autism Speaks and I will be teaching the 12:30 class! My lovely friends Alli and Flavia (who are currently undertaking their 200 hour yoga certifications) will be assisting, so you'll be sure to get some top-notch shoulder rubs.

If you're in DC, I hope you can come to one or both classes. It's a great cause and you will be in fantastic company. 

XO,

KCZ

The Perils of Walking in Yoga Clothes

Street art from Tatyana Fazlalizadeh's Stop Telling Women to Smile.

I walked home from work yesterday.

It was a little over two miles, and since I work at a yoga studio, I was wearing yoga leggings & a t-shirt. What I wear shouldn't be relevant to a story about me walking home, but it is.

That's because a man stopped me on the street during my walk home to tell me how attractive I am (quite, apparently). Here's how the interaction went:

Him: Excuse me?
Me [expecting to be asked for directions or the time, I stopped walking]: yes?
Him: Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt your walk.
Me [still expecting him to be asking for help, which I was happy to give]: No, it's fine. What's up?
Him: I just wanted to let you know that you are really attractive. Like, very cute. I wanted to tell you that.
Me [now very uncomfortable]: Um, thank you.
Him: Yeah, you just, you look really attractive.
Me: OK, thanks. I'm going to get back to walking now.
Him: OK that's fine, I mean I was going to ask you if you wanted to get drinks or dinner or something later...
Me: Bye, have a good day. 

So there's a lot to talk about here. Feminists have (rightfully) been pushing back against catcalling in public in a number of really awesome ways: The Hollaback app, Stop Telling Women to Smile and these articles in Ebony, Hello Giggles and Jezebel. But this wasn't a textbook case of catcalling. He was fairly polite about the fact that he was interrupting my walk home to tell me that he was physically attracted to me. Nonetheless, my feminist alarm bell went off as soon as he started talking about my physical appearance instead of, say, asking for directions to the metro (or even commenting on my yoga shirt).

This Jezebel article points to one of the issues at play here: body language/conveyed interest in the people around you. This guy approached me from behind as I was briskly walking and looking at my phone. I wasn't putting out "talk to me" vibes, I was trying to get home. Should he have gone for it anyway, if he felt that into me? Would I feel differently if I were attracted to him? He was a reasonably attractive guy, but based on the way we interacted and the fact that he stopped me on the street, I feel pretty confident in saying we would not work as a couple. Would his approach have worked on a different kind of woman?

Another perplexing part of this interaction is my own responses, which were all over the spectrum:

1. I felt guilty, like I was not being sufficiently nice to him. I felt bad for not letting him say his piece and ask me out, even though there's no way I would have said yes. 
2. I felt that by wearing yoga leggings as opposed to "real" pants, I was asking for it. This is the most insidious part of my internal dialogue because ideologically, I don't agree with it (here's a good explanation of why, if you're curious). But it is a thought that went through my head and refused to be silenced. The idea that since my bottom half was clad in spandex, I was on display and should have expected to be stopped on the street by someone asking me out. Not because I think I'm hot shit, but because men can't help but objectify us when we dress that way. 
3. I felt exposed, in ways I normally don't when out in public in yoga clothes. Usually, I feel fine, though somewhat embarrassed when I wear "workout" clothing to "non-workout" spaces (restaurants, shops, etc.). That embarrassment comes from a feeling that I'm violating social norms of appropriate clothing. The exposure I felt after being stopped, however, was more because I feared that every person who walked past me would examine/judge my body. Was I opening myself up for that sort of judgement by wearing such form-fitting clothing? Perhaps. But I was not aware of the public gaze until my suitor kindly reminded me of how attractive he found me. 
4. I felt angry, that someone could stop me on the street, take advantage of my willingness to talk to strangers, and objectify me. I also felt angry that this interaction brought up so many thoughts that were clearly driven by hegemonic cultural beliefs about women in public (see items 1-3), not my personal beliefs. 

I don't even know if this qualifies as street harassment, but it certainly made me aware of the issue of street harassment. Usually we hear stories of women being asked to smile, or catcalled in very sexually explicit/violent ways. What about what happened to me? Is it a less insidious version of the same? Or is it just a case of a guy spitting poorly thought-out game? Would a feminist man do the same?

I don't know the answers, but I'd love to hear what you think. Yoga ladies, do you feel comfortable walking around in public in yoga gear? Has something like this happened to you?

Do you think this is street harassment or just an awkward conversation?

XO,
KCZ

Let's tell the truth.

Maya Angelou and her friend Harry. 

“Let's tell the truth to people. When people ask, 'How are you?' have the nerve sometimes to answer truthfully. You must know, however, that people will start avoiding you because, they, too, have knees that pain them and heads that hurt and they don't want to know about yours. But think of it this way: If people avoid you, you will have more time to meditate and do fine research on a cure for whatever truly afflicts you.”   

― Maya Angelou, Letter to My Daughter

I just finished reading I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou (I can finally give it back to you, Abbi!). I loved her voice, so I looked at a list of her famous quotations to see if any of them spoke to me. This one did.

For the last few years, I've struggled with what to say when people ask me how I am. I aspire to be genuine, open and honest but I'm also aware of the fact that not everyone actually wants to hear that you've been an 8/10 on the pain scale for the last 3 days. "How are you?" is the kind of question many people simply toss into empty conversational airspace, only prepared to respond to "great! and you?", as opposed to a genuinely considered answer.

I used to instinctively respond with something positive when someone popped the question. I couldn't fully articulate it then, but that was because I believed that no one really wanted to know my pain, anger, annoyances or whatever else was truly going on in my head. This instinct, and the belief behind it led to a lot shallow friendships based on empty chatter, but few deep connections. It also meant that I suppressed my feelings/struggles in public, believing that I was only allowed to be sick or upset behind closed doors.

I'm such a big fan of Angelou's quote because my experience has led me to see how unhealthy it is to hide ourselves from the people around us. Years of claiming to be "great" when I wasn't meant a whole lot of swallowed tears, clenched fists and words unspoken. I believe you carry these unexpressed feelings with you, that they stay in your body, unprocessed because we fear there is no socially acceptable way to articulate them. They can harden like a brick, causing you to sink into depression. They can cause clenched teeth (TMJ disorders woo!), huddled shoulders, or crinkled spines because we train ourselves to hide our hearts. I still wear a night guard to protect my teeth from grinding the tension of my day out as I sleep (get in line, gentlemen).

I think we can do better, and I've been trying to do better myself. It's been awkward; led to a handful of weird conversations because I have answered a question too honestly or someone learned something they weren't expecting. Some people in my life find it exhausting, some call it selfish. They've learned not to ask me questions they don't want answered truthfully.

But it has helped me tremendously, in ways I never would have expected. Blessings that have come from my experiment in social psychology:

1. I've built significantly deeper friendships. One of my closest friends, Abbi, and I originally bonded because when she asked why I moved back home, I answered honestly (health issues).  In turn, she shared details of her situation that she usually waits awhile before dropping on someone she hasn't seen in years. Immediately, walls between us fell and we were able to simply be ourselves and support each other through our respective struggles. As part of that support, Abbi brought me to my first class at Tranquil Space, my yoga home. 
2. I'm less anxious in social situations. Instead of worrying about how I'm going to answer this question in a way that won't be "weird' or over-sharing, I just say what makes sense to me.  Sometimes it's the truth, sometimes it's a less intense version of it. Sometimes, I'll tell a white lie (like saying I'm "great" on days where I truly feel the opposite). Either way, I'm able to enjoy conversations as they unfold instead of fearing the inevitable questions.
3. I'm more comfortable in my truth. If I'm feeling angry, I accept that. If my head is killing me, I accept that too. Instead of suppressing my anger or carrying the weight of my pain in secret, I actually process how I'm feeling. I'm not perfect and there's certainly plenty of room for improvement, but my inner voice has definitely gotten louder. 
4. The bad ones, the ones who don't really want to know how my day went, the ones who aren't interested in a genuine conversation, don't waste my time anymore. I make them uncomfortable, or sad, or something else that they'd prefer not to experience. Either way, it's a natural weeding-out process that saves me a lot of time and allows me to focus on relationships that actually matter.

So, I'd like to join Maya Angelou in encouraging everyone to be more honest with the people around them. I think you'll be surprised with what happens.

XO,
KCZ

Fall Yoga Playlist

What I should be doing right now, as opposed to posting this. Photo by Andrea Lynn Taylor.

So I don't know how long I'll keep this one around. I was going to name it "October" but I'm not scheduled to teach any more in October, and what's the point of making a playlist if you only use it once?! Thus, Fall Yoga Playlist. With the caveat that there may be another one this fall, but only if I feel like it. Because I'm in charge around here.

I'm really happy with the serene Maxence Cyrin cover of the Pixies as my savasana (corpse pose) song. It feels familiar, safe and known but still new.

1. Múm- Green Grass of Tunnel
2. Lykke Li- I Know Places
3. Forest Fire- Future Shadows
4. Ellie Goulding- Anything Could Happen
5. The Flaming Lips- The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song
6. 1, 2, 3- Work
7. Cornershop- Natch
8. Phantogram- Don't Move
9. PHOX- Slow Motion
10. Beirut- Santa Fe
11. Here We Go Magic- Only Pieces
12. Peter Sarstedt- Where Do You Go To (My Lovely)
13. Ruth Moody- Dancing in the Dark (Cover of THE BOSS)
14. Maxence Cyrin- Where is My Mind (Pixies cover, repeated from the last playlist, since I hardly ever got to play it)
15. Bon Iver- Holocene

XO,

KCZ